This posts is one of the drafts I've mentioned in past entries. I've considered the concept of chosen family for years. It's a messy idea without a clear definition, at least in my case. Most of the time, I just know who's going to be added, sometimes within the first few weeks of meeting someone. Sometimes, I guess wrong, and that hurts. But usually, finding a kindred spirit (to steal from Anne of Green Gables) is a great joy and comfort.
Signs someone might be chosen family:
1. You can call when stuff is bad
These are people who are allowed to see you in your jammies, or when your house is an absolute mess, or when all you can do is sit on the floor and sob. No judgment. No hesitation. They just show up.
They may clear some dishes while you work up the gumption to tell them what happened. They might just sit on the floor with you.
2. You can call when stuff is good
When you have good news, you know they won't rain on your parade, downplay accomplishments, try to "one-up" you, or be a joy kill when you're basking.
3. They can keep a secret
These people know that the slip of a lip could sink a ship, and they'll honor requests for confidentiality.
4. You could talk for hours
You know that thing where you look up and realize it's been two hours and you thought ten minutes had gone by? That's super likely to happy with chosen family. Plan accordingly.
5. They see you
They know something is wrong or exciting or frightening whether or not you've actually said it. Half the time, they know what you're thinking about it before you've said anything. And then . . .
6. They speak truth to you
Whether is sassing you because you need to hear it or simply sharing a story about what they've learned from a similar experience, these are people who tell you like it is. No agenda, no cliches. Sometimes you don't want to hear it. Sometimes it might not be quite right. But it is true for them and it's honest and open.
No comments:
Post a Comment